Nonstick ??? From the Frying Pan into the Mouth !!!

Do you miss those chemistry lessons from school? Then, just head over to the kitchen section of a store. Browsing through the vast array of cookware is like taking a lesson in chemistry. There are just too many types of materials these days. From age-old cast iron and stainless steel to hard-anodized aluminum and a variety of chemical coatings like Teflon and Thermalon, nowadays, there are even stone-derived nonstick pans. If the materials do not make any sense, there are numerous chemical acronyms to help: BPA, PTFE, PFOA. A peek at the labels is enough to make any novice shopper realize that the more acronyms they find with the "-free" suffix, safer would be the product. If you are wondering what I am referring to, take a look at this post about nonstick cookware: What's In Your Non-Stick?

Cooking vessels : choose a type

In the last few years, there has been an increasing amount of research going on for everything including cookware material. A lot of data is being generated with the intent to help consumers. As newer brands come out with attempts to make the surfaces nonstick, they also release warnings and chemical jargon that can stick to our minds. We are prompted to think deeply before choosing even the most trivial items for day to day life. Who knows what is safe? Who knows what will be banned next? Who knows what will be the next cool thing? Aaargh! Did someone just say ignorance is bliss ?

Traveling back to a point in time when I was ignorant of such complexities, there were other struggles in the kitchen. It was the phase when my kitchen used to be a science lab. I was in experimental mode trying to understand the basics of cooking. What types of food would burn if I didn't add any water vs what would turn soggy if I did add water ? What would turn mushy if cooked too much vs what would stay like a rock unless pressure cooked? Almost all recipes required a long distance call to my mom for troubleshooting. Slowly, I reached a point where I could figure out the basics and started to venture into more adventurous dishes.

One day, I called home to get the recipe for a sweet dish for an upcoming dinner party. My mom is an expert in preparing this sweet which we call "duddali" in local language. The main ingredient "rava", a fine powder based on semolina, has to be roasted in clarified butter and then cooked with milk, sugar and other flavors. It sounds easy but the difficult part is managing the stickiness that would emerge when this rava is mixed with any liquid. In addition to the steps, I got all the tips and tricks for the recipe from my mom. Then my dad came on the line and added in his suggestion, "Make sure it does not stick". I gave him a confident and reassuring reply "Don't worry. I am going to use a nonstick pan to prepare this". He replied in the same cool tone, "Well, I was not referring to the pan but to the end result. Do your guests have nonstick mouths?". Aaargh! I wanted to scream. My evolving culinary skills were being questioned! I paused for a moment and my funny bone took over. I just replied "We'll find out if mouths too come with nonstick coating !!!"

Copying is bad ... but WHY ???

I was flipping through a magazine when this ad from Cadillac caught my attention. The quote "It is better to fail in originality, than to succeed in imitation" reminded me of a conversation that we had at home.

Originality vs Imitation

When my son was in Pre-K, he had a best friend. They were always together, choosing the same activities and doing the same things. I thought it was wonderful to find a best friend but his teacher perceived it differently. She thought he was not making his own choices but simply copying his friend. She wanted him to be independent and suggested we talk to him about it. That evening, I started off the conversation telling him "Copying is bad ...". I stalled to think how I could explain why it is bad. Of course, copying is like stealing someone's work or idea. However, that reasoning was not completely relevant in this context. So, how can I put it across?

As if she heard my question, my six year old daughter shouted out "Copying is bad because it shuts down your thinking". Wow! That was such a simple way to put it. One needs to develop individual thinking skills to grow and be independent. How did a six year old come up with this? Before I could ask, she continued enlightening us with what she had learned from one of her teachers. 

For new activities or lessons, the teacher would show them an example which they can copy. When asked to work on their own, they are not supposed to copy from others. They have to complete the task by themselves. If they copy, it will shut down their own power to think. The teacher's words conveyed the message in a simple yet powerful way. After all, who would want to do something that would shut down their thinking. So, WHY copy ?

What's for dinner today ?

"That's a surprise! The menu is still being planned." used to be our answer to this question from friends who we invite over for dinner. It was better to keep the menu a secret when the dish being prepared could end up as a surprise even for the cook. Many times, we have had to stash away a few dishes as they were not fit to be served to our friends. In those early days of cooking, I used to give this answer only occasionally. Now, after years of cooking, I give this answer more frequently!

In spite of the efforts to ramp up my cooking skills, the end result of tried and tested recipes is still not guaranteed. However, that is not the main reason for giving the same answer. Now, the question "What's for dinner today?" gets asked almost daily - by our kids! And this answer, to a large extent, avoids mealtime battles. When preparing something the kids already like, I give them the exact answer. When making something new which they have not yet tried, I beat around the bush saying I am not sure what I am making. Hearing the name of a new item or a dish made with an ingredient they did not like on first try sets the stage for an outright NO.

Rewinding back to my childhood, I can still remember how I used to say NO to any dish which had the slightest trace of yoghurt in it. I never used to like yoghurt. After umpteen tries from my parents, both of whom love it, I still could not eat it when I was in India. After coming to the U.S, I realized it was the smell that I did not like. In India, the yoghurt always has a strong smell which I still find difficult to tolerate. So much for having a long nose! That aside, the part that defies my current logic is why I used to not try any dish that had just a few drops of yoghurt. Call that the height of my pickiness!

Coming back to the present, life being really busy and a struggle to balance time between family and work, it is not easy to prepare something to cater to each person in the family. Though it is easy to let kids snack and eat something packaged and processed, that is not something we prefer. All of us eating the same meal without too many complaints would be ideal. Realizing there will always be a few things that each of us detest or can't tolerate, the aim is to keep that list minimal and keep our minds open to try new things.

Easy as it may sound, it is quite an effort to develop a positive attitude towards new varieties of food. Sometimes the trick lies in understanding what one does not like about a particular dish or ingredient. In our son's case, it is the texture that matters more. Using a different method to cook or coating with crunchy elements usually gets things past his texture test. For my daughter, she can't tolerate the heat of chillies and pepper. Reducing the heat or alternating a bite of hot food with cooling foods like yoghurt and fruits lets her savor the rest of the flavors. Once they start liking something, it is easy to leave out many of these customizations.

The nice thing was that the efforts at home were reinforced by my daughter's Pre-K teacher. As we speak another language at home, my daughter used to attend an ESL(English as Second Language) program. There was a good mix of kids from different cultures and countries. When the teacher hosted class events and lunches, she would insist that the kids be served a little of everything. She used to say that parents tend to give kids what they like trying to get past a meal without any hassles. She did make an excellent point.

After that year, I could see a great change in our daughter's approach to food. She is willing to give anything at least one try. With a little more effort to get past his stubbornness, her brother is also following suit.  Both of them have become more appreciative of cooking, fascinated to see an  ingredient they don't like being transformed into something they relish. They find it very interesting to say "I don't like tomato but I love tomato rice or if it is mixed in chaat (a savory Indian snack)",  "I don't like papaya but I love this yellow curry made from it", "I don't like pears but I like it mixed with walnuts". The list is long and I can keep writing but it's time to get started with dinner preparations.

Now, if you ask me, "What's for dinner today?", my reply would be "That's a surprise!". Believe me, the menu is still being planned!